Sunday, September 21, 2008

initially i wanted to just put off this post. but right now, i am suddenly fueled to type this out. even though im somehow quite weak in the head already.

though it is quite 'normal' for the elder one in the house to take charge as he/she usually knows more as to what is going on, there is often this 'commander' that originates from the lower ranks of the household. its not really nice to have a hierarchy within the same level, but then again, it cant be helped.
if you hate men so much, theres always the option of being a lesbian. its more socially acceptable nowadays. not that i have any bias against or towards them.

and everyone seem to have this fallacy that stay-out personnel in the armed forces have the best of lives in the force; canteen food, easy job, can go home everyday, zero stress! on the contary, i dare say that the lives are in fact worse than those of the combatants. it is the combatants that make up the army, but its the logisticians that keep it together! so we are actually in a sense, 'working' already. who's the stressful one now? with all the irksome nagging it will put off just about anyone who's about to help out in the housework, and not because 'he is expected to.' the more you expect something out of someone the more you will not get it.

please stop thinking that everything 'undesirable' in your own point of view originates from who i date, because its not like we can pass over anything like in chinese kung fu movies.

and for everyone's own good, please take note of what you eat from this year's hari raya pasar malam. it has already claimed a victim, less his life. lol.

Grrrr...2:19 PM

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Saturday, September 20, 2008

the most decent live shot as to what i can find so yea. feat Bryan Adams. Pete Townshend is just standing nearby.



No one knows what its like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes

No one knows what its like
To be hated
To be fated
To telling only lies

But my dreams
They arent as empty
As my conscience seems to be

I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
Thats never free

No one knows what its like
To feel these feelings
Like I do
And I blame you

No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain and woe
Can show through

But my dreams
They arent as empty
As my conscience seems to be

I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
Thats never free

When my fist clenches, crack it open
Before I use it and lose my cool
When I smile, tell me some bad news
Before I laugh and act like a fool

If I swallow anything evil
Put your finger down my throat
If I shiver, please give me a blanket
Keep me warm, let me wear your coat

No one knows what its like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes

Grrrr...9:37 PM

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Sunday, September 14, 2008

watched wall.e yesterday.. must say that many may miss the subliminal messages that may exist in the movie. this was one movie that moved me to tears since many before, as i see what extent two people(robots) are willing to do for each other. and the strange ways a guy can tell a girl he likes her hahahahaha *coughkungfupandacough* it also portrays 'love' not only between two individuals, but also on a macro-scale, Ala for all human beings.

some things that's happening recently has come to make me feel like I'm a 2Nd class citizen. maybe its all my wistful thinking, though things look otherwise in more ways than one.

Grrrr...10:01 AM

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Thursday, September 11, 2008

As the day begins to fade
Eventide's when I'm afraid
I'll never know if you appear
But my senses say you're near

In the dark when I write
Telling fortunes for my life
I'm sitting here by candle flame
When will you arrive again

Grrrr...1:19 AM

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Thursday, September 04, 2008

today's the 2nd day since mum entered SGH early on wednesday morning for her scheduled operation.. and with totally NO help around the house, its quite tiring trying to make sure everything's orderly... though nothing is right now.

now that i kind of cleared myself of having any trace of autism in me, looking back i wonder why have i displayed such behavior that led me to think i was.

from a series of events and decisions yesterday, peppered with some from the more distant past, i have thought, is there a 'model answer' to everything?

somehow humans think theres a sure-fire way to do everything, like how to get 6 points for O levels, how to complete a video game, how to date a girl, how to make her reach an orgasm, how to play music properly, blah blah the list goes on and on.

kinda set thinking by phrases said by alot of people, like 'do get this, you MUST do this this that that...' and the likes.

but what if we dont have that "MUST"? then have we become 'have-nots'? is there only space for one method, one way-of-life, and one perspective in reality?

model answers are only there because people said so. take the tshirt for example. it was usually worn as an innershirt for people like the old'school soldiers from the US-A. as they have the habit of wearing it out just like that during recreation, some catch on to the trend saying that its cool and now, we have tshirts as main tops. if they were wearing quilts out, we would all be scottish by now.

so i have come to realised that we all have our own model answers to whatever we think or do. alot of successful individuals everywhere have their own ways of doing what they do, just that we merely copied onto their methods and called it 'the model answer.'
~~
A tout le monde (To everybody)
A tout mes amis (To all my friends)
Je vous aime (I love you)
Je dois partir (I must leave)
These are the last words
I'll ever speak
And they'll set me free

Grrrr...8:32 AM

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